Brave New World
by andromedasangst
Summary: Set after 2x07, Robert contemplates his past decisions and his relationship with Cora. Can he still love her like he did before the war? Is their marriage beyond redemption with this undeniable rift between them?
1. Chapter 1

Every night Downton Abbey was silent, a colossal creature in slumber, and if one crossed it's path they wouldn't suspect the house, wrapped and hidden in darkness, to be there. Tonight, however, was an exception, as one light shone from one of the top rooms- a dim beacon calling softly.

It was no one other than the Master of the house himself who lay awake, unable to sleep, as he was unable to prevent the constant trickle of thoughts into his mind. His wife Cora was asleep beside him. She was turned away, catching the light on her delicate neck and shoulder. Despite their recent differences they still adhered to old traditions, such as sleeping in the same room.

Just looking at his wife, Robert could only think of Jane. Jane, the maid he had practically abused that same day. For the hundredth time, strong currents of regret coursed through him. From the very moment he had lunged at her (yes, lunged, he cringed in embarrassment just recalling it) he had felt nothing but regret, shame, and self-loathing.

Everyone here respected him, his family, the staff. He knew what they thought of him: he was a man of morals, a man of honor. He knew that the servants took pride in having him as their master. In fact, he had always striven to uphold those attributes and to live up to the man they believed he was. Their faith in him had given him self-confidence, yet now he felt like a crook or a phony.

It was these characteristics of honor and decency that encouraged him to maintain good relationships with the staff. But he had crossed the lane.

Poor Jane. He felt sorry for the maid. She had lost her husband and in the midst of her grief come here, only to be taken advantage of by him.

And it wasn't as if she had seduced him. There had been certain moments between them- he acknowledged that- yet he had always been the one to initiate any moments of intimacy between them. Oh what a foolish man he was! And how apologetic she had been- for his mistakes! Her willing to resign for his actions- her good will only caused him to regret his selfishness more.

Cora stirred beside him. He looked once again at his wife. They had certainly grown apart the past year, there was no doubt about that. From the war they had both emerged as different people- he didn't really know the woman next to him as well as he used to. He had no knowledge of her fears, her hopes, her dreams. It was these that they used to confide in each other in those sleepy hours before they put out the lights.

Now they simply said goodnight, a curt unfeeling one, and fell asleep in silence, wrapped in their own thoughts, fears, hopes and dreams.

Yet despite all this, Robert knew he still loved her. They had such a history, and remembering the early years of their romance still brought a smile to his face.

He remembered the first time he had introduced Cora to his mother- how nervous he was!

He knew that Cora's nationality alone would provide Violet with enough material to rip her to shreds. What's more, he was afraid that his mother would be too loathsome to endure as a mother in law, and Cora would change her mind.

He had underestimated her in both accounts.

She had sat at tea with his mother, her posture impeccable, her etiquette flawless, and she had maneuvered through the conversation easily, politely deflecting all provoking comments Violet aimed at her. As their conversation progressed, Cora transformed before his eyes; she was no longer the most wonderful woman he had ever met, she was a goddess. Her blue eyes were unwavering as they met with his mothers, and as Violet emitted yet another remark concerning Americans, Cora's red lips curled to reveal a row of perfect teeth, flashing Violet a divine smile. That was when he knew, without doubt, that this was the only woman he could ever marry- no matter what his mother thought.

As they were about to leave Violet's house, Cora went to fetch her coat and Robert knew his mother would take the opportunity to point out the many flaws in his fiancé.

"Robert, I must say-" she began.

"Oh do save it mother", he interjected. "For my mind is quite made up and nothing you can say will persuade me to change it."

"Marry her, Robert", Violet said in a rare tone of genuine compassion. Robert frowned, speechless. "You won't find another woman like that, you know. She has something of a backbone and I must say, I quite admire her for it."

"What did your mother say?" Cora asked pressingly, her voice revealing tones of apprehension as well as playful excitement.

They were seated in the back of their carriage, Violet's estate growing more distant as the horses pulled them towards home. It was early spring yet traces of winter could be seen everywhere; a cool mist hung just above the gravel track on which they traveled. It was in this kind of weather that the carriage was completely sealed, providing those inside with complete privacy.

Robert could only smile. He gazed out the window and watched, content, as the world went by.

"Robert, tell me!" Cora pleaded, smiling. "It can't have been that bad!"

He turned to look at her. "It doesn't matter what she thinks", he said, before leaning over to kiss her. She stopped him by putting a hand on his chest.

"Robert", she said, her blue eyes serious. "She's going to be my mother-in-law. I should very much like to know her opinion of me."

He smiled again. That day it seemed as if he would never stop smiling. "She admires you. And if I don't marry you, I believe she will be somewhat disappointed."

Cora's eyes widened in surprise, but before she could properly express her delight Robert was kissing her with a passion she had never thought possible.


	2. Chapter 2

The next morning Cora had already left the room before Robert woke up. As Bates dressed him, Robert could barely look him in the eye. Bates was the most honorable man he knew. Every time Robert had doubted him, Bates had turned out to be more decent than before. It was evident Bates regarded him as his equal, if not his superior- what if Bates knew how foolish he had been?

"Everything all right, my lord?" Bates asked.

Robert cleared his throat. "Yes, quite alright."

He inspected himself in the mirror. "That will be all Bates, thank you."

After Bates had left, Robert contemplated taking Isis for a walk, but thought better of it. He decided instead, to join the others for breakfast. If he was planning to reconcile with Cora it would be best to give his attention to his family rather than his dog. Downstairs he found Cora, Mary and Sybil seated at the table. Cora was looking at some pamphlets- Robert guessed they were from Isobel, concerning refugee matters. Sybil looked miserable, and Mary was looking at Sybil intently. There was certainly an odd atmosphere between them. Robert seated himself at the head of the table.

"Are you feeling better, my dear?" he asked Sybil. She looked up quickly, as if pulled out of a dream. She glanced at Mary.

"Not really," she replied glumly.

"Well that's unfortunate to hear." Robert started flicking absentmindedly through the morning's newspaper. They didn't bother having it ironed anymore- that was just another ridiculous triviality they had dropped during the war.

"Where's Edith?" asked Cora, as though she had just noticed the absence of her second daughter.

"She said she was going for a walk," Mary said wearily. She stood up to leave.

"And what are your plans for the day, Mary?" Robert asked, glancing up from the paper.

"Richard will be here at eleven, I thought we might go for a drive." She directed her gaze at Sybil. "I'm just going to let the chauffeur know he'll be needed."

Sybil dropped her fork. "I'll go", she said quickly.

Mary raised her eyebrows. "I think I'll manage."

With that, Mary exited.

Robert and Cora glanced at each other- what was wrong with their daughters this morning?

Sybil looked very upset, her eyes were glazed over as if she were fighting tears.

"Sybil darling, are you alrigh-", Cora started, but before she could finish Sybil had fled the room, leaving her breakfast unfinished.

Robert and Cora sat in silence for a moment, not quite sure what to make of it all. Robert knew better than to question the affairs of his daughters and didn't dwell on the matter. In fact, he was thankful to have Cora alone for the moment. He felt he should say something but he struggled to find the words.

"I'm meeting with Isobel today," Cora said, breaking the silence. "She's going to tell me more about the refugee programs." Her words were matter of fact, they were said to inform him of her whereabouts rather than for conversation. He hated this. He wanted her to know how much he loved her, and in turn he wanted their marriage to revert back to how it was, leaving this odd formality behind them.

"Cora, I..."

At that moment Jane came in with a tray of breakfast and placed the food before him. She kept her eyes averted.

"Yes, Robert?" Cora looked at him expectantly.

Robert glanced between her and Jane. "I...never mind."

He couldn't express his love for Cora in front of Jane, it seemed wrong. It would only make Jane feel uncomfortable, and he had made her uncomfortable enough already.

She was unloading the tray hastily- perhaps she already felt uncomfortable. Robert watched as she took hold of the tea, her hand shaking. She must have felt his gaze and as a result dropped the teacup she was holding. The china broke despite the soft carpet, scattering small fragments beneath the table.

"I'm terribly sorry m'Lord!" she cried, dropping to the floor, face flushed, grabbing at the pieces of china. Cora stared wordlessly at her.

"It's quite alright", said Robert. His tone was curt, not harsh. It softened as she continued to clean up the mess. "Really", he said. "Leave it. I'll clean it up."

She stopped, and lifted her head up to meet his eyes. Quickly she averted them again and hurried from the room.

"Is it really too hard to find an adequate maid these days?" sighed Cora.

"Don't be too harsh on her," replied Robert. "She lost her husband in the war and she's raising their child alone. It can't be easy."

Cora stared at him. "Well she isn't the only one! We've all made sacrifices and seen people we love suffer as a result of this war."

"Some more than others." Robert bent down to pick up the last few pieces of china. 

"Robert, don't bother. It's the maid's job," said Cora resignedly, sipping her own tea.

"And why shouldn't I? It saves the maid an extra five minutes that she could spend elsewhere. Besides, don't you feel our old customs to be rather outdated?" Having picked up the last of the china, he sat back in his chair and spoke to her directly. He hesitated, before continuing. "Don't you ever feel that all the emphasis on propriety, manners, dress- don't you ever feel as if those old traditions are slipping away and the world is becoming a different place?"

Cora blinked. "Robert, what has gotten into you?" was all she could say.

He raised his eyebrows quizzically. "Would you really go back to our lives before the war, Cora?"

"Of course I would", she replied incredulously. "The war has done nothing but cause damage and grief. I should like nothing more than to go back to our lives before the war- back to _normal."_

There was a natural pause. Nothing but the faint tick of the clock on the mantelpiece and the clink of Cora's cup to her saucer could be heard. Robert looked around the room and tried to picture himself in it before the war. Before all the death, all the suffering- a time when what he now considered a small problem would have been the cause of all their worries. Trivialities blown out of proportion.

"Perhaps some of us could never return to that life", said Robert softly, almost to himself.

Cora's gaze was guarded. "What exactly are you implying, Robert?"

Her tone was cool, but he could see the hurt in her eyes. There was a terrible sadness in them. It occurred to him that she thought he was referring to their marriage, and he cursed himself for unconsciously pointing out the rift between them. Hadn't he promised to resolve things with Cora? Again, he thought back on taking her to meet his mother. He recalled the amazing, spirited woman whom he had kissed in the back of that carriage. She was still here, sitting at the table opposite him. In part it was the lack of effort he had put into their marriage that had caused her to withdraw and he knew now that with enough support she would be revived. Slowly, he would be able to close the distance between them- perhaps she would meet him halfway.

He spoke softly, but without concealing the passion that laced his words. He didn't want anyone else listening in- he intended these words for Cora only.

"What I'm trying to say is… rather than dwelling on the past I believe we should look forward. Move on from the darkness of war and resume our own lives as best we can."

He reached out and placed his hand over hers. It wasn't uncomfortable or awkward, as he had predicted. It felt natural.

"Together."

In reply, she squeezed his hand and smiled. He had been deprived of that smile for a while now, and he marveled at how it made him feel: confident, content and blissfully happy.

He had no idea where they were headed; what life had in store for them. In this brave new world awakened from war many things were uncertain. There was, however, one thing of which he was certain: this was the woman he loved, and she would be with him every step of the way.


End file.
